Tuesday, September 06, 2005

Lance Armstrong Threatens to Bore Us to Death

A day after dazzling the world with his engagement to Sheryl Crow, Lance Armstrong is threatening to come out of retirement and force the media to talk about how inspiring he is again.

I'm no fan of Lance. I'm glad he got better from cancer -- I wish sickness or death on no one. But, come on. He dumped his wife to move on to Sheryl Crow and has gained celebrity by winning a bike race that no one in the U.S. gave a crap about 20 years ago, and one that most still don't know why they should care about today.

My sneaking suspicion is that he's starting to realize that he and Sheryl aren't going to work out if he doesn't get back in the saddle and keep his notoriety up. Sure, she's got 10 years on him, but she's still the hotter end of the matchup and he's going to have to do something to hold up his end of the bargain.

So don't be surprised if he we have to put up with another year of Lance next summer.

@ Casino of the Atlantic, JWAB says: "the fact that Armstrong would be coming back for no other reason than to piss off the French makes him one of the greatest people in recorded human history. I hope he comes back, wins, and then gives the French media a nice fresh urine sample to study."

@ Lij: "Don't piss off Lance Armstrong, because he'll never go leave you alone if you do."

@ Remco Bron: "I truly hope he will come-back out of retirment to shut-up all the critics. Go Lance!"

@ OU JMC 1013: Ms. Crimson, Derek says: "No one is above scrutiny in the French media. Supposedly, the same is true in the US. But the Armstrong story does not go much further than discussing his LIVESTRONG bracelets and fighting cancer, despite how prominent a figure/hero he is in America and France."

@ MeisterBlog: "how cool would that be?!?! i’d be counting down the days until next July, that’s for sure!"