Wednesday, November 02, 2005

Rule 21: Kiss Bill Frist's Ass Or He Will Cry BooHooBooBoo

In Major League Baseball, Rule 21 basically states that it's not OK for a team or player to purposely lose.

When I first heard about the Democrats and Rule 21, I assumed they had broken this rule and were actually attempting to win something.

Holy crapoly! I was right!

Senate Rule 21:

1. On a motion made and seconded to close the doors of the Senate, on the discussion of any business which may, in the opinion of a Senator, require secrecy, the Presiding Officer shall direct the galleries to be cleared; and during the discussion of such motion the doors shall remain closed.

2. When the Senate meets in closed session, any applicable provisions of rules XXIX and XXXI, including the confidentiality of information shall apply to any information and to the conduct of any debate transacted.

Now, on the surface, invoking Rule 21 doesn't appear to be all that big of a deal. But the U.S. Senate is full of a bunch of aristocratic snobs who believe they are God's gift to America, and they get quite huffy if someone doesn't act genteel and proper or, of course, doesn't kiss Bill Frist's ass. (I've heard they even have For Senators Only signs over the morning donuts to remind the little people they are unworthy of fresh bakery.)

So Harry Reid gets up and says he wants to use Rule 21 to close the Senate doors, chase out the media and assorted lackeys, and talk about what the fook is up with this supposed report on how the fook we got into Iraq when every single person with any power knew full well that it was bullsheets and went along with it anyway. Covering up Scooter Libby's lying ass with a new Supreme Court justice named Scalito was a tricky move, but Reid wasn't having it.

Oh, how Willie Frist carried on! He couldn't believe the audacity, the sheer ballsiness of using the dreaded Rule 21 without Reid telling him it was coming! Using the rules to get important questions answered is simply not done in the U.S. Senate! How can Bill Frist ever trust Harry Reid again, despite the fact he couldn't give a rat's ass what loser-party Harry Reid has to say anyway?

All this B.S. is just theatrics, of course, but the media jumped all over it, because they've got a lot of space to fill and people like fights, even if they can't understand what the fook the fight is about. If Harry Reid made them dim the lights in the Senate and Bill Frist wet his trousers over it, that's news, baby!

In the end, it doesn't mean crap, but it's good to see some fight in the Democratic dog, even if it's mostly of the yappy poodle variety.

@ Waveflux: "All those awful goings-on in the Senate yesterday gave Missouri's Kit Bond a tummy-ache: 'Republicans are outraged,' Sen. Christopher Bond (R-Mo.) reported. "I just ate lunch, and it's upset my stomach.' Bond's gut is calm enough when he's voting to support torture. Funny, isn't it?"

@ The Arizona Eclectic: "Isn't it interesting how Republicans can dish out the criticism (often, if not always, lies) but if a Democrat does something perfectily legal and straight forward that a Repug doesn't like -- watch out. Out comes the tantrum (like with Fristy-baby's reaction to the use of Rule 21)"

@ Culture Freak: "Who would have guessed that Harry Reid would grow a pair and catch Bill Frist and the GOP off guard, let alone make them cry like little girls?"

@ The Ostroy Report: "it's a bold message to the GOP that we'll no longer lie down and let it run the country recklessly and without accountability and public scrutiny."

@ Right from Left: "Reid and his grumpy band of whiners made themselves look ridiculous yet again."